When I feel stuck in my life, it is important to take stock of what is going on and find out if there is something I are doing or not doing that is keeping me stuck. Sometimes the situation is out of my control, and I need to look inward and find the patience required to wait with equanimity until things move forward again. Many times, though, I can find the source of my stagnation in my own heart and mind.
Sometimes clinging to old ideas about reality has me stuck and I need to make adjustments that will bring me back in tune with life, so I can move forward again. Sometimes fear of change is what keeps me stuck, and I must resolve to find ways of facing that fear.
If introspection does not provide the answers I need, it can sometimes be helpful to ask those around me if they notice anything obvious that I might not be able to see. I ask someone I can trust to be kind and sensitive as well as honest. I let go of my resistance because whenever there is something I can’t see myself, it’s because I don’t want to see it. I try to listen with an open mind, and remember that I am always the final judge of what I need and do. Anything offered to me from an outside source will need to be processed within before its wisdom can take hold.
In all this, I try to be kind to myself and remember that I get stuck sometimes. I think of it as a necessary step on my journey, rather than as a problem that shouldn’t be happening. This can help to keep my frustration at bay and give me the space I need to take a deep breath and really figure out what’s going on.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Turning Inward During Winter
In the depths of winter, we tend to forget that bare trees will once again be full of foliage, the grass and flowers hidden from view, will burst forth once again. While they slumber, nature is continuing her work at the center of each living thing. We can think of our blankets and warm clothes as similar protection—like the cocoon that surrounds a changing caterpillar—while we undergo our own inner transformational work. In the meantime, the lights that twinkle and the fires that warm us can serve to remind us of the flame of life that burns within us.
In order to stoke our inner flame, we can use the time indoors to focus our attention on our homes and families. We can become distracted by the world outside and forget that we need to nourish the lights that warm our hearts. Interacting at a soul level can be done by sharing stories from our hearts, doing projects together, dancing, or playing games. Devoting energy this way helps us build a stronger bond that will sustain us once the world allows us each to pursue our individual goals again.
Winter allows us to feed the flame in our own centers by reading or researching to nourish our dreams and plans for the future. This can mean catching up on all the quieter things we wanted to do but didn’t have time for, like reading books, watching movies, or listening to music. We may have set aside creative pursuits such as painting or writing that can be brought back to the center burner now. It is also a great time to do some journaling to look back on the year that has passed and perhaps the years before this one in preparation for forward motion in the coming year. Nature’s wisdom offers us opportunities to nourish our inner seeds of hope in preparation for our future, so let us enjoy the inner warmth and be grateful for it all.
In order to stoke our inner flame, we can use the time indoors to focus our attention on our homes and families. We can become distracted by the world outside and forget that we need to nourish the lights that warm our hearts. Interacting at a soul level can be done by sharing stories from our hearts, doing projects together, dancing, or playing games. Devoting energy this way helps us build a stronger bond that will sustain us once the world allows us each to pursue our individual goals again.
Winter allows us to feed the flame in our own centers by reading or researching to nourish our dreams and plans for the future. This can mean catching up on all the quieter things we wanted to do but didn’t have time for, like reading books, watching movies, or listening to music. We may have set aside creative pursuits such as painting or writing that can be brought back to the center burner now. It is also a great time to do some journaling to look back on the year that has passed and perhaps the years before this one in preparation for forward motion in the coming year. Nature’s wisdom offers us opportunities to nourish our inner seeds of hope in preparation for our future, so let us enjoy the inner warmth and be grateful for it all.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Our Comfort zone
Our Comfort Zone
Most of us have had the experience of doing some dreadful task only to finish it with feeling invigorated, filled with a new sense of confidence and strength. What is funny is most of the time when we do them, we come out changed and wondering what we were so worried about or why it took us so long. We may begin to look for other tasks we’ve avoided so that we can feel that same heady mix of excitement and completion.
No matter the reason we avoid things, we think it will force a change we’re not ready for, yet, putting it off only creates more obstacles for us. On the other hand, when we face the task at hand, no matter how onerous, that action creates a flow in our lives and allows us to grow. The relief is palpable when we stand finished, knowing we did something even though it was hard or we didn't want to do it. Yet if we cling to our comfort zone, never addressing the things we don’t want to face, we cut ourselves off from the flow and growth of life.
It seems, we all have at least one thing in our life that never seems to get done. To bring that task to the top of the list and promising ourselves that we will do it on such and such a date, is an act that could liberate a tremendous amount of energy in our lives. Whatever the task, we will allow ourselves to be fueled by the promise of the feelings of exhilaration and confidence that will be the natural reward for conquering that obstacle.
Most of us have had the experience of doing some dreadful task only to finish it with feeling invigorated, filled with a new sense of confidence and strength. What is funny is most of the time when we do them, we come out changed and wondering what we were so worried about or why it took us so long. We may begin to look for other tasks we’ve avoided so that we can feel that same heady mix of excitement and completion.
No matter the reason we avoid things, we think it will force a change we’re not ready for, yet, putting it off only creates more obstacles for us. On the other hand, when we face the task at hand, no matter how onerous, that action creates a flow in our lives and allows us to grow. The relief is palpable when we stand finished, knowing we did something even though it was hard or we didn't want to do it. Yet if we cling to our comfort zone, never addressing the things we don’t want to face, we cut ourselves off from the flow and growth of life.
It seems, we all have at least one thing in our life that never seems to get done. To bring that task to the top of the list and promising ourselves that we will do it on such and such a date, is an act that could liberate a tremendous amount of energy in our lives. Whatever the task, we will allow ourselves to be fueled by the promise of the feelings of exhilaration and confidence that will be the natural reward for conquering that obstacle.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Step Away From Anger
When I find myself in an argument, I feel I am losing control of my emotions and they have taken on lives of their own. When I become aware that this is happening, taking a deep breath can help me step back away from the situation. Once I separate myself from the heat of the moment, I find the emotional trigger that began the argument has little to do with the present situation, yet may have brought up feelings related to something else entirely. Looking honestly at what caused my reaction allows me to consciously act more appropriately to the situation and make the best choices.
We can ask questions of our mates and friends to help all of us discover the source of arguments. The shared awareness can aid in finding simple solutions to something physical, like low blood sugar or even a hormonal surge. Maybe we are too serious, and we can just laugh and watch the tension dissolve. We could we are addicted to the excitement that drama brings and the chemicals that our body creates when we are angry. But there may be a deeper issue that requires discussion, understanding, and patience. The more we allow ourselves to step back and examine our reasons for arguing, the easier it becomes to allow real feelings to surface and guide us toward solutions that improve our lives.
When we are clear about our feelings and intentions and communicate them, we have a far better chance of getting what we want than if we lose control and allow our subconscious minds to manipulate the situation. We might take our frustrations out on the people closest to us because we feel safe and comfortable with them. Yet, misplaced anger can cause more harm than good. Debating for what we truly believe can empower us and help us to direct our passions toward greater life experiences. Truly knowing our reasons for loosing control and arguing enables us to grow emotionally in ways that will affect our whole being.
We can ask questions of our mates and friends to help all of us discover the source of arguments. The shared awareness can aid in finding simple solutions to something physical, like low blood sugar or even a hormonal surge. Maybe we are too serious, and we can just laugh and watch the tension dissolve. We could we are addicted to the excitement that drama brings and the chemicals that our body creates when we are angry. But there may be a deeper issue that requires discussion, understanding, and patience. The more we allow ourselves to step back and examine our reasons for arguing, the easier it becomes to allow real feelings to surface and guide us toward solutions that improve our lives.
When we are clear about our feelings and intentions and communicate them, we have a far better chance of getting what we want than if we lose control and allow our subconscious minds to manipulate the situation. We might take our frustrations out on the people closest to us because we feel safe and comfortable with them. Yet, misplaced anger can cause more harm than good. Debating for what we truly believe can empower us and help us to direct our passions toward greater life experiences. Truly knowing our reasons for loosing control and arguing enables us to grow emotionally in ways that will affect our whole being.
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